Grumpymuffin
by infinite nemo
Summary: A Day in the life of Sagara Sanosuke with a slight annoyancetwist thrown it. All day, Sano tries to get a muffin, but is eluded every time! How does a foxy doctor help him? Read and find out! SM & KK


Being the impulsive little girl I am, I promised a friend I'd write him a story. He has no idea what Rurouni Kenshin is… but that's ok. (I'm not even sure if he really knows that I write…) I stopped in the middle of writing a new chapter for "Summer Guest" and "Prom" to do this, but I think he deserves it, as… he has to deal with muggings and knife fights in Syracuse… *sigh* =D So review, please- I told him I'd show him what you guys thought of this!

A Day in the life of Sano… with a nemo twist- enjoy!

Grumpymuffin:

Muffins Muffins Everywhere… but none for Sano!

            Sagara Sanosuke felt the sun shining in and woke up and stretched, but the relaxing motion was disrupted by the rumbling and gurgling coming from his stomach. He sighed and finished stretching then stood up. 'Gotta fix that hole in the curtain…' he thought absentmindedly. After pulling on his shirt with the signature "Aku" on the back, Sano began rummaging around his food storage.

            "Damn. Nothing." He slammed the lid back unto the basket abruptly. "Che- what was  I expecting? I haven't had any luck gambling so I'm low on cash… it's not as if I'd buy my own food… I haven't been able to go to the Akabeko because Tae is getting more and more upset with me… and it's almost not worth going to the dojo since Jo-chan has become determined to learn how to cook and 'be a good wife'…" Sano shuddered. "Good thing Kenshin loves her more than life…" He grinned, "but then… Jo-chan's got a lot of things other girls don't and Kenshin is one lucky guy." Sanosuke shook himself. "But however good a person she is still won't feed me… especially since the food she makes is toxic… better try my luck at the Akabeko. Maybe Tsubame-chan'll give me some food… I don't think my stomach can take another one of Jo-chan's meals."

            Sano opened the door to his home thinking about how difficult and under appreciated an art bumming was, and almost bumped into one of his neighbors. The man was eating something, and he nodded at him perfunctorily. His neighbor spoke,

            "'hayo Zanza," he muttered around the food in his mouth, "hungry?" he clutched the food a bit closer to himself.

            Sano threw him a scornful look. The seedy looking man shrugged. "Well, anyway, there's free food at the manager's apartment.        

            "Free?" Sano questioned.

            "Aa."

            "Why?"

            The man shrugged. "I don't know- it's from the government of something. Why question something free that's good? I guess they want to keep us happy and make sure people like use don't cause any more trouble." The man smirked.

            Sano's eyes narrowed. "How do you know it's safe?"

            "Food is food. Anyway, don't worry- it's good. Anyway, nobody's died yet." He snickered.

            "Hmph." Sano didn't want to question how or why his shady neighbor knew how to check for poison. He began walking in the direction of where a crowd had gathered.

            "You'd better hurry." The man said through another mouthful. "They're almost gone."

            "Thanks- Ja.!" Sano took off at a fast pace. 'Good. Now I can go see Tae fro a better meal0 like lunch or dinner- that'll tide me over until Kenshin cooks again, which hopefully is soon! Anyway, I wonder what food it is…'

            When Sano arrived there was an even larger crowd of people, and he saw a thuggish male about his age picking on a little kid at the edge of the crowd. 

            "Oi! What'dya think you're doing there?" Sano asked, cracking his knuckles. 

            "Damn kid tried to steal my muffin!" The thug kicked the kid who had been pushed down.  Sano felt his anger flare as the little form crumpled from the blow. 

            "I doubt that!" he growled, then paused quickly in confusion. "What the hell is a muffin?" He shook his head. "Whatever- just leave the kid alone."

            The teen's eyes gleamed at the prospect of a fight when he actually looked at Sano and saw the bandages on his hands.

            'Hm, must be a new comer if he doesn't know me…' thought Sano, preparing himself to fight. 

            "I'm gonna kick your ass!" The teen yelled as he charged Sano. There was a space created as the crowd stepped back, yet penned them in at the same time. Sano just laughed, which made the punk even angrier. He swung at Sano and missed. Sanosuke continued laughing and let the kid take a few more swings at him. Finally, the thug became even more enraged, and panting, pulled out a knife.

            'Time to stop this now before anyone gets hurt.' Sano thought as he quickly grabbed the knife and brought the hilt down hard unto the back of the teen's neck. 'Too bad he's a thug- he's probably around my age when I first met Kenshin…' 

            The manager of the establishment walked up.

            "All right people- fight's over- get your food and go!" He called out, the n stepped up to Sano. Sano stiffened, then relaxed slightly. His landlord did some shady things, but overall he was still a good sort of person. 

            "Better look at your hands." He said to Sano as he walked past him to help up the kid. Sano watched as he pulled the cap off the kid's head and long black hair tumbled down. 

            'Another Kenshin?!' then, "Naw… a girl? What's she think she's doing here?!' He stared in shock as the man clapped a hand on the girl's shoulder.

            "Lucky for you Sagara-san was here to protect you from Genroe, Nanami-chan,  you'd better be careful. You ok?"            

            She nodded.

            "Good. Now go get your breakfast!" He gave her a slight smile. He then walked back up to Sano.

            "You ok Sagara?"

            "Aa. Fine." He grunted. "Now what's this I hear about food?"

            The man laughed. "Come on."

            They arrived at a tale loaded with baskets, where a few people still loitered. Sano's eyes scanned the baskets- they were all empty, then he saw an arm reach into one. It was the little girl, and she grabbed one of the bread like things and handed it to a little boy who was equally grubby next to her. She then pulled her own squished muffin out of her sleeve and took a bite. Sano peered into the basket where she had gotten her muffin. Empty. The landlord shrugged and said apologetically,   

            "Sorry Sagara- looks like they're all gone." 

            The girl looked up, and broke off a piece of hers and held it out to Sanosuke. 

            "I'm sorry- if you hadn't helped me, you could have gotten one."

            He grinned roguishly. "Its ok kid- I got my morning workout. I'm not that hungry anyway." He looked at the girl and the boy, who he assumed were siblings. They both looked half starved, and he had the fleeting wish he could take care of them. "You got a home?" They nodded solemnly. "Good." He felt the girl look him over.

            "You're bleeding!" she gasped. 

            "This? It's just a scratch." He said with his usual cocky attitude.

            His landlord stepped up. "I'm keeping an eye out for those two- don't worry, and you'd better go see a doctor, you never know if that knife was clean." 

            Sano looked at the man in surprise, and then let a small grin appear on his face. "Thanks." He set off in the direction of the clinic. 'Maybe Megitsune will feed me after she's done scolding…' 

~*~*~

            When he arrived at the clinic, there were a few patients, and Megumi walked out with a foreigner.

            "Thank you very much for the recipe."

            "You're quite welcome, Takani-sensei-you didn't need to give me more herbs today- you gave me plenty enough yesterday."

            "Oh, it's fine… if it all works out, that's the least thanks I could offer."

            The man winked then said, "Well, thank you again."

            Megumi smiled and waved, then turned.   

            "Sano? What are you doing here? I'm busy."

            "Hey- I'm a patient here!"

            She pursed her lips. "Alright, come on." She turned to another man. "Orimo-san, Dr. Gensai will be here in a few minutes." 

            "Arigato, doctor." 

            She then reached out and grabbed Sano's ear.  

            "Ow! Careful, woman! I'm injured!"

            "It's not going to kill you, chicken-head. Now," She pushed him to the examining table. He hopped unto it. "What's wrong with you?"

            He held up his hand. She sighed and took it, then inspected it. "Well, it's not deep enough to need stitches… just let me clean it and bandage it." 

            After she was done applying ointment, while she was bandaging his hand, she asked,

            "What happened?"

            "Some punk was trying to take a girl's muffin."

            She seemed surprised. "You guys had muffins?"

            "What- you think we're not good enough for them?"

            "No, no." she shook her head impatiently. "I'm just surprised. I guess it's a city wide effort then- and I have no idea why they're doing it."

            "Hm… so you guys had them?"

            "Yes."

            "What's a muffin?"

            Megumi laughed. "It's like a cross between bread and a cake. It's a Dutch food (0). We still have some in the back- you want one?"

            Sano stared at her with limpid puppy dog eyes. "Does this expression tell you anything?" 

            She laughed, and tied the final bandage. "If you didn't get hurt so much or into so many scrapes, you wouldn't need medical attention, and you could get to food a lot more quickly, baka tori atama." 

            "Che. You are a kitsune-onna, here I am, a starving injured man, and you're trying to lecture me."

            "You're impossible."

            "If I come back tonight you could try to figure me out." Sano said suggestively. 

            She threw him a scornful look. "Clearly your hunger has addled your brains."

            They walked to the back, and heard a child's laughter. 

            "Megumi-nee! Sano-nii!" (1)

            "Ayame-chan, Suzume-chan- what- where's your grandfather?"

            "Sleeping." Ayame said seriously. 

            "Sleeping! Sleeping!" chorused Suzume. 

            "Hm…" Megumi smiled fondly. "Well, have you two eaten yet?"

            "Sleeping?" asked Sano under his breath.

            "Uhn! Uhn! We ate!" (2)

            "I doubt it," said Megumi in a similar manner. "What did you two eat?" She asked the two children kindly, looking at the crumbs around their mouths and on their clothes.

            "Muffins!"

            Both adults looked at each other, taken aback.

            "Hm, Dr. Gensai must already have come in." Megumi mused. "So, girls, where are the muffins?"

            "Gone."

            "Gone where?" Megumi asked patiently.

            "In my tummy!!" shrieked Suzume, and the two girls laughed hysterically.

            "I certainly hope not…" she muttered. "if those two girls are all of them, they're going to be very sick."

            Just then, Dr. Gensai walked in.

            "Ahh- there you are Megumi. Good morning Sano." He set an empty cloth lined basket on the table. "I gave one each to Ayame and Suzume and brought the rest to the patients- I hope you've eaten."

            "Thank you, Gensai sensai- I have," said Megumi with a wry smile, "but muffins just seem to be too elusive for our chicken head here."

            "I'm sorry Sanosuke- I didn't know or I wouldn't have given them all away."

            "It's ok." "It's his own fault anyway." Sano and Megumi spoke at the same time. Sano glared at her. 

            "Well thanks for looking at my hand, kitsune onna- I'll see you all later."

            "Sano-nii, come play!" 

            "Uhn, uhn! Come play with us!" 

            Chorused Ayame and Suzume respectively. Sano gave them a half smile and ruffled their hair.    

            "Sorry kids, I gotta go." He said half apologetically. He stuck a fish head into his mouth and walked out of the clinic. At this point, it was almost lunch time. 'Che- I should have eaten something at the clinic, but it wasn't worth sitting there and have Megumi nag me…' He headed towards the Akabeko. 'I'm so hungry, I'll even help wash the dishes or something so long as I get food.'        

~*~*~*~*~

            He walked in.

            "Welcome to the Akabeko!" said a pleasantly smiling woman who was bowing. She looked up, and her smile faltered slightly.

            "Oh- hello Sagara-san…" 

            "Hello Tae-san, I'm starving so I decided to come here, the best place in town."

            "Uhm, thank you, but… er…about your tab…"

            Sano laughed quickly. "Oh you're so humble- you don't need to bring it up and tell me all debts and clear and thank me for getting rid of those thugs every time I come here!" 

            Tae sweatdropped. "Er, well, no, that is…" Just then another customer walked in, and she greeted them. Sano took that time to slip into an unoccupied booth. A waitress walked up.

            "Hello sir, what can I get you?"

            "Hey there Tsubame-chan, how are things going with Yahiko?"

            She looked up and blushed. "Oh! Sagara-san…" 

            "What- have I got something on my face? What's with this… all you people here are treating me so strangely!" 'It looks like I'm seriously going to have to do dishes… well, I guess I'm eating at the dojo tonight. I _really hope Kaoru's given up by now…'_

            "Oh-nothing, nothing… er, Yahiko is fine- he's been spending more time here…"

            "Ah…" Sano grinned and lifted an eyebrow. Tsubame blushed.

            "Oh no! It's just well… Kaoru-san is still learning how to cook…"

            Sano sighed internally. 'Well, toxic food is still better than starving… I think… well, hey- on the bright side… maybe Jo-chan's gotten better! ... Who am I kidding? I better fill up.' "Hm, well, I'd like whatever you've got that's cheap. Tell Tae-san I'm gonna pay today."

            "Right away! Of course!" Tsubame smiled and hurried away. She brought a small dish of tofu for Sano while he was waiting for his meal. While he was eating that, Tae walked over.

            "Sagara-san! You're actually going to pay today?" She asked excitedly. 

            "Well, I'm a little short on cash," her face fell, but he continued, "but I'm willing to do something else to make up for it, like wash dishes or fix the roof or something…"

            Her smile brightened. "Excellent. That works out perfectly."

            Sano paled slightly under her evil smile, and wondered if he should have just shelled out the cash for the meal. Just as he was about to say something, shouts broke out across the restaurant. Tae hurried over to try to calm down the customers.

            "Please sirs, the other patrons are trying to enjoy their lunch- if…"

            "Shut up woman! Don't get involved in a man's fight!"

            The other one yelled. "Trust a _muffin thief like you to treat a woman like that!" He turned to Tae. "I'm sorry lady, but he doesn't know any better- his mother never taught him to teach ladies with respect, or not to steal things."_

            "You leave my mother out of this!"

            The second man smirked. "You're making a scene, muffin thief."

            The first man picked up his cup of sake and splashed it over the other man's face. Sano stood. 'That had to of hurt- there's going to be a fight…' he grinned in relief. 'This'll take care of my debt to Tae!' He walked over to them and directed Tae to a safer place- she was still trying ineffectually to calm them. 

            "Look boys, why don't you take this outside?" Sano drawled, knowing that with this distraction, both of the men's anger would be directed to him. 

            "Keep your nose in your own business, boy." The first man snapped.

            The second man sighed, "Did your mother teach you no respect, muffin thief? Even a punk like him should be addressed politely…"

            Sano resisted the urge to bristle, and turned his attention to the first man who was taking a swing at the taunting man. 

            "Come on." He said sharply, and hauled them both outside. "Now, why don't you tell me what happened, and it better be a good story- not to mention the same."

            "Get off me." The angry man yelled, jerking away, while the taunting man stepped out of Sano's grasp and brushed his clothes off. Sano clenched his teeth and kept his hands from balling into fists.

            "He took my muffin, this morning, when they were brought to the workplace by the police officer." The calmer man said.

            "I did not take your fu-"

            "Ah ah," cautioned Sano. "You're in the middle of the street, where small ears can hear."

            "I didn't take it." Snarled the man. 

            "Yes you did." The other man replied, and then he turned to Sano. "And you, boy, really should just leave people to their own business."

            "Look," gritted out Sano, "I don't care about what happened to you at all- my only concern is that you're causing a disruption in my friend's restaurant."

            "Well," the man said in a reasonable tone, "there would be no problem if he didn't take my muffin."

            The first man opened his mouth to protest, but Sano cut him off. "Look- I'm getting really sick of you. So what- do you want him to be arrested?"

            "I guess so."

            Sano withstood the urge to growl. "Look, I know the police officers- they won't care about this at all. So, you didn't get a muffin?"

            The man shrugged. "No, we both had one, but I had another one because I just got promoted, so I got it because I'm in a higher position."

            Sano's hand fisted. "That's not true!" The other man protested, "You don't know that you're being promoted at all- you're just assuming!"

            "Enough!" Sano roared. "Both of you got a muffin and you're complaining? I've been to two different places already, and _I haven't gotten a muffin!"_

            Both men calmed down and forgot their anger in the heat of Sanosuke's. 

            "Clearly he didn't get a muffin," the second man said, "otherwise he wouldn't be so upset."

            "Yeah…" the first man said, "those muffins were really good…" 

            Sano ground his teeth in frustration. "So are you two ok now? No more fighting?"

            The second man shrugged. "I guess so, I mean, at least I still got a muffin, and one muffin is better than no muffins…"

            The first man apologized. "I'm sorry for taking your muffin… care to come over for dinner tonight? My mother-in-law is here, so I'd enjoy the company, but anyway, she's a really good cook…"

            The two men walked off and Sano buried his head in his hands. 'If I don't get a free meal for this I'm going to go do some serious ass kicking…' 

~*~*~

            Inside the Akabeko, the waitresses were walking from table to table with baskets under their arms and offering items in them to the customers. 

            "What's going on here?" asked Sano suspiciously. 

            Tae paused in front of him and beamed. "Why, that nice Fujito-san just dropped off all these muffins for our patrons! This is excellent- all the customers seem to be enjoying them a lot! We're almost out."

            Sano's eyes widened, and he was just about to ask for one, when Tsubame walked up to them breathlessly.

            "Tae-san- I'm so sorry, but we've run out of muffins!"

            "Oh- that's ok Tsubame-chan, all of the customers got one- some even got seconds!"

            Sano felt a twitch developing in one eye. He headed towards the door. 

            "Sagara-san- are you ok?" called out Tae. 

            "Fine." He barked, and then his voice softened a little. "I'm fine." 

            Tae and Tsubame watched him walk out in amazement. 

            "I think Sagara-san is getting very annoyed." Said Tsubame in a hushed voice- then she remembered something. "Oh my- he didn't pay again!"

            Tae smiled down at her and patted Tsubame on the head. "I know, but… don't you think his expression right before he left was worth the tofu? And anyway, he did prevent a fight from breaking out inside…" 

~*~*~*~

            Sano walked to the woods a constant stream of swear words rolling out from under his breath. He thought he saw a police uniform, and quickly shied away. 'If I deal with the police today, I'm seriously going to get in trouble. And if it's Saitou, I'm gonna get killed.' 

            He began to practice, doing his own version of deforestation. After Futae no Kiwami-ing quite a few trees, Sano was worn out. He rested for a short while, and trained again. 

*~*~*~*~

            When he noticed it was getting somewhat late, he headed for the dojo. As Sano was passing the tree where once Hiruma Gohei had hidden while he challenged Kenshin when they had first met. He thought he spied something, or rather, felt something, and stopped, then squinted carefully. He was right. 'Holy- there's someone up in there! Who would be staring into the dojo? Where's Kenshin- Kami- what if he's killed Kenshin! What if-' Sano shut his mind down and called out. 

            "Hey troll- get out of that tree!"  

            A large man fell heavily out of the tree. 

            "Look, I don't know what you're thinking, but my friends live there- and I'm not going to let you mess with them." Sano said while cracking his knuckles, ignoring his protesting muscles. 

            "How did you know I was in there?" the man growled.

            "Please- that horrible stench- and that vile aura… a blind person could have found you," Sano paused to consider it, "or a dead person." 

            "You won't defeat me!" The man cried desperately. 

            "You're right," Sano said calmly.

            "I am?"

            "Yes. I'm going to beat you into a pulp only after you tell me why you're here." 

            The man remained silent.

            "Is it because you want the title of the strongest?!"

            "Wh-what?!" 

            Sano's eyes narrowed. "If you don't want to beat Kenshin for the title of the strongest, what are you doing here?"

            "The strongest?" The man questioned. 

            "If you're doing just to stall…" Sano threatened. 

            "I'm not! I'm not!" 

            Sano shook his head. "If I scare you, you obviously aren't here to fight Kenshin… ever hear of a little guy called the Hitokiri Battousai?"

            "H-H-Hitokiri B-Battousai?"

            "You got a speech impediment!?" 

            "N-Noo…" the man moaned miserably. 

            Sano began to feel slightly bad for the miserable little man. "Look- if you'll just tell me what you're here for… I don't want trouble any more than you do." 'In addition to the fact that beating this guy would be worse than beating up Yahiko… of course it all depended on what he was doing if the scum deserved it...' Sano unconsciously ground a fist into his palm.

            "All right! All right!" the man squeaked. "I heard this was the last place with muffins!" 

            Sano took a _deep calming breath, and counted to 20. (3) Slowly. 'Ok, I'm glad I still have the chance of getting a muffin, even though if I get my hopes up they'll run out… but I'm pissed off this guy wanted to steal them-one-any.' _

            The man looked at Sano and cringed, but as he kept on watching Sano, his expression became curious. 

            "Hey- you alright?" 

            Sano opened his tightly screwed shut eyes and glared at the man for all he was worth. 

            "Er… right, thanksforyourtimebye!" 

            Sano watched the retreating figure, and knew it wasn't worth it- even though he seriously wanted something to hit at that moment. He walked in through the back gate just as Kenshin was shutting the front gate.

            "A visitor, Kenshin?" He asked.

            "Ah, hello Sano," The rurouni smiled. "it was a police officer dropping off a small gift- he said everyone in the city was getting them today." 

            "What was it?" Sano asked eagerly. 'If the guy just left, there's no way they could have finished them- but then… why isn't Kenshin holding a basket?'

            "Oro- well, I had Kaoru take them into the kitchen.

            "Well come one then!" Sano grabbed his friend by the arm and dragged him in the direction of the kitchen.

            "Ororororo." 

            Just then, Kaoru walked out unto the porch and both men stopped. Sano stared hungrily at the object she was nibbling on. 

            "Hello Sano- come to bum more food?" She joked. 

            "Awe, Jo-chan, I've been good all of today, and I'm starving!"

            She stared at him incredulously, "You haven't eaten?"

            "Nothing but some tofu at the Akabeko… then a fight broke out."

            "Hmph." Kaoru put a hand on her hip. "So finally Tae wised up and didn't feed you. Good. Anyway," she glanced at the fishbone hanging out of his mouth. "Why don't you save some of the money- or all of it- that you spend on fish heads to buy real food?"

            "I don't buy them." he said, staring longingly at the sweetbread Kaoru was nibbling. "Anyway, are you done lecturing?"

            Kaoru had known what he had been staring at. "Yes Sano," she said with a grin. "I'm done- go inside and eat a muffin. They're quite good," then she turned. "Kenshin- I saved this for you… 'cause you know who my muffin is?"

            He grinned and encircled her with his arms and rubbed noses with her. "Not sessha." He said teasingly. 

            Kaoru giggled. "Mou- of course not- not sessha anything, Kenshin..." 

            "Aa." He rumbled. 

            Their voices became a murmur. Sano glanced at him wide eyed over his shoulder.

            "Oi- kid- when'd they become like that?"

            "It gets worse!" Yahiko said emphatically in between bites of muffin. 

            "Hey- slow down- you're going to choke!"

            "I am not!" the protested, but the venom in his tone was lost as he tried to speak and swallow at the same time and choked. 

            "Great Yahiko-chan…" Sano sighed as he pounded Yahiko on the back. "Why are you eating so quickly?"

            Yahiko, recovered, resumed eating. "To make sure I get my fill before _those two do!" _

            Sano glanced over to where Yahiko had gestured, and saw Ayame and Suzume eating like machines, their cheeks filled out like they were chipmunks. 

            "Oi! You two- slow down! You're going to choke too!" They both looked at Sano solemnly and shook their heads, eating throughout that process. 

            Sano sighed. "I don't know what to deal with you people. There's you," he gestured at Yahiko, "who can't even supervise these two because you're worse than they are, and you two," he stared down at Ayame and Suzume mock menacingly and they paused long enough to giggle. "Who must have eaten your weight in muffins today," then he looked outside, "and then there's them! Ack!" He quickly turned around. "I did _not want to see those two necking or whatever."             _

            Yahiko shrugged. "They've been really lovey dovey. I guess they just need the wedding to happen soon. Anyway- you just get used to it."

            Sano shuddered. "There's something wrong with all of you- it has to be the muffins." He paused and peered into the basket. 'Whew- I'm fine, there's enough in there that there's no chance I won't get one…' He walked towards the door and yelled at the couple, "Oi! Get a room! Anyway, maybe you should just move the wedding up!" 

            They broke apart, Kaoru was blushing madly. She was too embarrassed to say anything, so Kenshin turned to his friend.

            "Sano…" he said warningly. 

            "Ok- ok," he said, his hands up in an imitation of how Kenshin usually had his to prevent a fight from breaking out. "I'm sorry… I won't interrupt your make-out session anymore…"

            Kenshin took a step forward.

            "Er, just joking!" Sano ducked back into the kitchen to see Dr. Gensai and Megumi had arrived. "When did you get here?" he demanded. 

            "After you did, baka tori-atama," Megumi said calmly while eating a muffin. 

            "Who's the baka if they couldn't understand my question, kitsune?" he said challengingly. 

            "Now, now," said Dr. Gensai while eating a muffin. "Calm down… here Sano, have a muffin." He held out the basket then peered into it. "Oops- there are none left- but I'm sure you've had one at some point in the day…"

            Sano felt his eye twitch return along with a throbbing vein in his forehead. He walked out of the room and stalked past Kenshin and Kaoru. They broke apart from their embrace and stared after him.      

            "Sano?" Kaoru's clear voice drifted after him.

            He ignored them and kept going, resisting the urge to Futae no Kiwami the dojo walls, since he knew Kaoru wouldn't appreciate that. He eyed the washtub and considered dunking his head, but decided that it would only make him angrier. His hand balled into a fist. Just as the stone wall was about to get it, two voices rang out.

            "Sano!" "Dinner's ready." 

            Sano sighed in dejection, shoulders slumped. 

            Kaoru waited on the porch for him in the twilight. 

            "Bad day?" she asked sympathetically.

            "You have no idea…"

            Kaoru grinned. "Well, don't be a grumpymuffin- anyway, Megumi made dinner today- so you're safe." 

            "Well at least that's the one good thing…" Sano growled as a chucking Kaoru followed him into the room.

~*~*~*~

            Dinner went surprisingly well for Sano, because almost everyone had stuffed themselves too full of muffins to compete with Sano for the food, and Kaoru and Kenshin were too involved with each other to pay much attention to the food. Sano ignored them steadfastly, thus keeping his appetite.  

            'Sometimes I wish they wouldn't have admitted their feelings… I mean… they're just so _sweet to each other… it's gross.'_

~*~*~

            After the meal, Sano and Kenshin sat on the porch, while Yahiko walked Dr. Gensai and the girls back home, and Megumi and Kaoru washed the dishes 

            "So, you found our squirrel." (4) Kenshin stated.

            "Squirrel?" asked a satisfied Sano. "Anyway, why didn't Jo-chan cook today?"

            "Megumi asked to…" Kenshin said absentmindedly as he turned to Sano. "what else do you call creatures in trees?" 

            "So you did know about that guy."

            "Or course." Kenshin grinned. "I was considering keeping him for Ayame and Suzume to play with."

            "You weren't." 

            Kenshin grinned and shrugged.

            "You know- Jo-chan has done a lot of good things to you, you know that?"

            "Aa. And Megumi has done a lot of good things for you too."

            "Hmph. She can't stand me."

            "I'm not so sure about that, Sano…anyway, why don't you just spend the night here- I'm sure Kaoru-dono won't mind."  

            "S-"

            Megumi and Kaoru walked out, and Kaoru said,           

            "Hey, chicken head- walk Megumi home."

            "You just want time alone with Kenshin." He taunted.

            Kenshin leveled a glare on him.

            "Uh… right. Come on Megumi."

            Everyone froze.

            "What?"

            Kaoru spoke first. "Well… you… you called her Megumi."

            "Hmph. Whatever- come on."

            Kenshin got up to stand by Kaoru. They watched as Megumi and Sano walked out of the dojo then looked at each other knowingly.

            "I think it worked." Kaoru whispered confidingly to Kenshin.

            "Aa…" he murmured back, drawing her into his embrace.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

            "What's the matter, Sano?" asked Megumi as they arrived in front of the clinic.

            "Nothing." He said shortly. "You're staying here tonight Megumi?"

            "Yes." She smiled brilliantly. "You said my name again."

            He blushed. She laughed girlishly. 

            "Come in- you seem really tense- and I want to look at your hand again."

            "No reall-"

            Megumi half walked in and turned. "I have muffins." She said coyly. 

            Sano perked up both at her words and his tones. 'Now this is a game I can play… I think…' He followed her in and shut the door after him. "Hm… how do you have muffins?" he asked in a low tone. 

            "Wouldn't you like to know?" She teased. "Now lay down- you're incredibly tense and it isn't healthy." She pushed him unto the examining table for the second time that day. 

~*~*~*~*~

            A while later, Sano was half awake and half asleep, focused mostly on how relaxed and comfortable he was. Finally, almost drifting off to sleep, he noticed Megumi's ministrations had stopped. 

            "Megumi?" He called tentatively as he pushed himself up with an arm. 

            She pushed him back down. And pulled up a chair so she could sit facing him. "Sit- you shouldn't move just yet."

            "But-"

            "Shh…" His eyes focused on her red lips, then her warm brown eyes. "Why do you always call me a fox?" She asked quietly.

            "Because you always call me a chicken."

            She fondly bopped him on the head. "You're avoiding the question."

            "Because…because…"

            "Yes?" she prompted.

            "Because I'm afraid you'll ignore me otherwise." He said drowsily.

            "Why would I ignore you?"

            "Because you don't like me." He muttered. 

            "What?"

            "Nothing."

            "I liked you enough to save you a muffin. In fact, I like you enough to save you muffin_s" 'And not just save…'_

            Sano tried to process this through his foggy brain. He blurted it out before he thought.

            "Will you be my muffin?" A small part of his brain screamed out, 'You idiot- what are you thinking? Megumi's a _lady and you're calling her a muffin?'_

            Surprisingly, she didn't have a biting comment. Instead, Megumi asked softly, 

            "Do you want me to?" 

            Sano made a supreme effort to lift himself up and forward, and just before his lips touched hers, he whispered. "Aa." 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

At the Akabeko… 

            Just after closing, Tae and Tsubame stood in the storage room surveying what supplies and ingredients they needed more of. A few stables were clearly depleted. 

            Tsubame then whispered, "How many muffins did Megumi-san make?"

            Tae rolled her eyes. "I don't know- but I she certainly made enough- or enough to clear out the kitchen of its supplies!"

            Tsubame stared at her normally ever cheerful boss.

            "Oops- hehe," ^_^ "I mean, I sure hope everything turned out perfect just like it should have for Megumi-san!" Said Tae. 

            Tsubame sweat dropped and walked out of the storeroom. 'Adults…' 

AN:

(0)- I absolutely don't know where muffins came from- heck, my friends and I didn't even know what to call a muffin other than a muffin- so… =) 

(1)- I *totally* don't know if I have that right… please tell me if I don't!

(2)- I can't for the life of me really figure out how to spell that… 

(3)- Can Sano count to 20? *snickers* AIEE! ::dodges large heavy blunt object being thrown by Sano fans::- seriously guys (girls) I like Sano! I was just joking! (and I mean, I wrote a fic entirely about him!) 

(4)- Are there squirrels in Japan? I don't think so but… 

=) some of these phrases were put there explicitly for my friend… LOL even though he'll probably never read it. 

O_o- this turned out to be a lot longer than I meant for it to be… *grin* it took me about 10 hours to write this… (Or all day) I kept getting distracted… I hope you guys enjoyed the K/K WAFF- I guess they were annoying but I hope they were kinda cute too… Orororo, I can't bear to go re-read this b/c of how terrible it is… I'll do it tomorrow. (sorry the plot isn't' that great… the whole point was for Sano to go after muffin, and at the last minute I decided to have a real muffin and metaphorical one, but… I didn't really develop it… blech!)

UNEDITED!!

PLEASE REVIEW!!! (thanks a million for reading!) *offers all readers a muffin* *offers all reviewers 2 muffins* 

=D


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